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Tuesday, 11 November 2014
Friday, 6 September 2013
Lapastrophe: Hidden Agenda
What hidden agenda do you have that you decided to dress carelessly and
sit ruthlessly like this in a public place? Your girls are screaming for
attention and your oil rig caused a heavy spill, to the extent that
able-bodied guys almost lost control. We hate this distraction, madam.
Pay a fine of N7million.
Wrong size!
It is so obvious you are not wearing your size, and you are trying to
cheat your stature. Also, with this exhibit, we found that you are an
accomplice in style crime because at the scene of the crime, you tried
to conceal the magnitude of the style offense with your bag. You have
been pronounced guilty and must pay N3 million fine.
Tuesday, 13 August 2013
Agbaya!!!
Offense: We don’t understand why a full grown adult would go to the market and
pick what is meant for a 12-year-old.(Agbaya) Aunty, with those unevenly toned
laps and dark patches, this is just too flimsy and cheap.With all the
authority bestowed on this court, this dress will remain in our custody
until we figure out what to do with it.
Judgment: You will be granted bail on the following conditions: Produce two sureties that are renowned missionaries and two Islamic clerics with property on Victoria Island and on Banana Island
Judgment: You will be granted bail on the following conditions: Produce two sureties that are renowned missionaries and two Islamic clerics with property on Victoria Island and on Banana Island
‘Press’ release
Offence: Sincerely you don’t need this press release to make a fashion statement. With
your style of hair and make-up, you need not try too hard to make an
impression. Your "oranges" release is contempt of style proceedings
Judgement: you have been fined N3 million
Judgement: you have been fined N3 million
Tuesday, 6 August 2013
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